kangaroo or boar???

I went to safeway yesterday and bought myself a kangaroo steak, went home and cooked it. here's how it looks like :

looks more like steak eh?! (of course it looks like steak, its a kangaroo steak...duh!)

I cook it mid-are and well-done (i prefer the mid-rare 1s though)

after eating, I had a good night sleep, lol. Well, that's not the point Im showing kangaroo steak over here, it's just a reminder that I had kangaroo meat before. Right in front of me right now, I had two choices, kangaroo or boar, what's kangaroo and what's boar you asked? I used to go to Serdang in Kedah back in Malaysia to have boar meat, and they cooked/fried/whatever in thick curry sauce/paste/dips, so that's boar; Kangaroo is the one I've just ate yesterday, so basically it says, Australia or Malaysia????

Well, I know that Malaysia is all going down and stuff but Australia is just too damn slow for me, people over here tend to spend their own "sweet" time just complete their task, and worst part is, they said things like: "If worse comes to worst, the government will take care of me." Oh, come on, grew up you freaking Aussies, you are no better than those lazy piggies back where I came from, the only differences is that you own bigger and stronger currencies, and oh, Aussies had higher debt level. Im not condemning Aus for being so damn slow and stuff but I just felt underachieve over here, I want to do and achieve great things in life, maybe because people around me are more successful than I am and I say to myself: " I ain't dumb, I ain't got no skills, I ain't did things lesser than any other people, how come Im still here?" and I know I used to live in a slum but so what? I want to be the next slumdog millionaire, of course not by entering a freaking contest. I had so much plan back home but there is so much doubt that it will ever work out, as I know things are getting too tense back home and support that I'll get won't be as much as it used to be. Im stucked here with 2 very unchosable choices, and I had no idea how to elaborate more cause It's my problem and I had to deal it myself anyway and this is just a journal of my slum life, and no point writing this in 10 pages or more as I will not get an answer still, so why bother. I love my country but its dying and I love everyone beside me but its not their life, its mine and I love where I am now but I know I might make a wrong decision and Ill regret it and making the one around me felt like Im never good with decision especially my consultant and my parents.

Alot of people want me to stay including my consultant as he said this would be the biggest mistake of my life and my business life if I do. Even my really close friends over here was saying things like: "Jacky, why? Give more time for Australia." or something like that. I would love to, but I aint got what it takes to take such risks, I never put anyone in a situation where I had to think of so many parties involved cause usually, it's only just me but this time it involved my consultant, my parents and me. What if I could really make a differences back home? What if Kangaroo steak just ain't for me, Im more of a boar guy? What if I can achieved more back home instead of waiting and wasting time over here hoping that opportunity will came through one day? What if I don't have to involved so many people and still achieved what they said I would over here? and the list...goes onnnnnn..................................